today was my xray day,but as a result of watching the jap show till 2 plus and only getting sleep around 3,i woke up at 11 (after falling asleep after picking up a 9 a.m. call from trinette asking about my knee) and could only get to the doctor's at about 12.then i had to get a referral to east shore right outside my house,went there to get my xray done and had to wait till 3 to collect the results.in the mean time i completed my NUS application,thus rendering myself free from horrible uni apps for the rest of the next 2 weeks.AND nothing's broken,nothing's fractured.i've just got myself a beautiful set of 2 xray photographs of my left knee.i tried looking for my head xrays but my mum told me they were thrown away years ago.that is pure artistic potential going to waste i tell you.
to celebrate my newfound freedom from both work and uni apps,as well as peace of mind that my knee was no longer shattered in a few pieces i decided to lie down and gorge myself with lit and lang.i kinda gave up on the draggy p.s. i love you (i do not really like cecilia ahern's writing now that i'm experiencing it for myself) and moved on to the much more intriguing the time traveler's wife.it is indeed as mesmerizing as it is confusing.i'm not done with the first chapter so i'm still trying to figure out,with my slow dull mind,what exactly is going on and what kind of weird disease the male protagonist has.
then it was T.V. time! my most educational time of day.from E! to home&health to hour asia to star to channel 8,you really can learn alot from tv.i was especially caught up with human stories on home&health which covered the stories of 3 teenagers suffering from speech problems due to severe stammering.it was so painful just watching this guy called nathan trying so hard to talk to the camera about his issues,see him struggle to act in his performing arts class so that he wouldn't screw up during his school play.then there was another guy called woody who couldn't talk to strangers because he would get all nervous and not be able to get his words out besides the first syllable or so.and the last one was a younger girl also called joanne and she was so sweet and pretty,loved to read,but was so impaired by her stammering that people hung up on her when she tried calling in to apply for stuff or something.it was so heartbreaking.just thinking about how there are people out there in conditions worse than me,yet realizing that we're all in this huge rejected-by-majority-of-society problem together reduced me to tears actually.i cannot believe i cried,but at the same time i believe it cos inside i know what it feels like to literally battle the world head on every day of your life.to assert your self identity,to preserve your dignity and honour as a person despite of who you are,because of who you are.and it's not easy.
i wonder if i'm exuding some sort of ambient sadness because my mum just asked me if i was okay and insisted that i seemed sad.does watching too much TV and slacking around do that to you? what kind of sadness could it be man,the one i mentioned in my previous post? i can think of quite a few additional things that are getting me down,but all i want to do now is watch my wife and kids...music and lyrics (i still have NOT)...something,anything.i am also resisting all temptation to watch the other boleyn girl online.i think i shall just get the book and distract myself until midyear rolls around and it'll be out finally.ah.
is life now good?
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